Commenced at terminus

 

 

The ship that was capsized

With complete crew within

That was only me with festoons

Those now rot and bask on shore

For the voyage never commenced

And the world overturned on sand

My sweat now rolls down the brow

The people somehow sing praises this hour

Till now they knew not of their ignorance

The sun turns sublime below the blue

As the ocean covers the graying sky

The throngs melt into a fading world

As you appear closer than ever before

Still raw like you always had been

Only our horizons never touched

Now the sea pours his drops in your eyes

Your ravine hair blows like a sky bound tide

Neither a word till now was said ever

Nor a word is needed anymore

The capsized ship has found the destination

For the voyage commences at terminus

If it’s a topsy-turvy world

It is upright to me ..

 

Delhi

23.20 hrs

31.10.23

2102

The Key to an imaginary lock

 

There is a traffic signal where your  expensive car comes to a halt late night.  You are busy on a phone call from other stake holders and there is a terrible escalation in office. Noting that there are 180 seconds to the  green signal , you open the lunch pack to avoid resentment at home . As you respond to allegations on phone , the morsel gets struck in the windpipe and you start to cough. You open the water bottle and it spills over you. Then you realize there is also a constant tapping on your windscreen and a few poor children are begging, expecting a good contribution from the expensive car. Struck amidst all this,  you throw the food out and curse your situation driving car home. The children are jubilant while they pick the feast . The same food that irritated you . 

What has changed the situation?  Only the state of mind . One man’s trash is treasure for another.

How do we keep ourselves happy ? Someone responded that as expectations cause disappointment  which ultimately causes sorrow, we must lower our expectations.  But by doing so, most often we feel being let down by ourselves or compromising on life . Our ancient thought is also not to bother about the result and to just concentrate towards discharge of our duty . This appears to be too perfect and ideal to follow ..

How do we manage this critical piece in the modern and practical world ? This needs some basic discussion first.

So to begin with , what is happiness ? Happiness is a state of mind . If we can manage to keep our mind out of bother and in good shape , troubles will fail to have any impact on our happiness .Sometimes we admit that a particular person makes us lose our cool. So in one way, we have handed over the keys of our mental state to the particular person. Then he enjoys taking us for a ride while we suffer at our plight. Should we not be the chauffer of our mind ? So we will have to take our own responsibility and respond with prudence , which is more critical than proving others wrong. We will not bang our car on another being driven in a wrong lane only to prove our point. Our first aim is to keep our car safe. That is precisely what it implies to keep our calm amidst all turmoil and provocation. 

Finally, happiness is like the equilibrium of a balanced body.  To maintain the equilibrium,  the centre of gravity must be the lowest possible.  Same stands for mental equilibrium.  The happiness must flow from lowest and not highest point. For us , if a small own home meant happiness years bqck , then a larger one followed by a bungalow,  now we find that  happiness erodes. However, the pettier the pre condition to be happy is, the easier it is to be happy. It is like dancing , you do not bother how your moves appear , and if you really enjoy your dance the outcome will also be enchanting . The cause will bring about the effect and not vice versa. So I will be happy with being alive itself. That is in fact the lowest denominator wherein the resultant value of fraction will be higher . So, in a prefect situation if the denominator is next to nil, our happiness will be infinite.  

So the next time we feel sad, be thankful for your breath that is still up and running! There is no misery in the real world, we fabricate it by altering our prefect state of mind..that begins with childhood which also incidentally remain the best days of our life . This is the Key to a non existent and imaginary lock.

The brass plated razor

 

It was my 20^th birthday when I was a nobody graduating from Arts in a college which was a haven for folks who were not doing much in life. It was literally a refuge , like a deserted port one could barely shore up to in a storm. Such a port has no facilities  it is a mere space to live , that’s all. Nor do the “refugees” have the privilege to complain, for as it is there is a storm that keeps them away from the sea. So they compromise with life and survive with their mediocrity.

 

Coming back to my birthday,  one of my close friends gifted me with a razor. It was really rather a piece that was too good for me to use. I mean, it was an expensive razor with certain parts plated with brass. I kept  treasured it and kept it safely till the day I felt it was truly deserved for shaving myself. Two years later, I eventually landed on a job just after completion of graduation.  But it was “ just a clerk trainee “ that I was in a Pvt Bank , so the razor remained like an unused treasure. Within a month I had cleared another competition as an all India topper but still it was “just an executive assistant “ in an NBFC. So I was still not worthy , so it seemed .

As I had appeared in several competitive exams after graduating, their results had started to trickle. Finally the big day arrived after 5 months. I had cleared Bank PO in my first attempt and now I had arrived finally . During my next trip to home I excitedly dug into my treasure and unpacked the razor .

To my shock, the non plated parts of the razor had crumbled out of non use . I could not muster courage to throw it in garbage . This event had taught me a good lesson on life. Our life is a gift , just unwrap it and enjoy ! That one day of having sufficient time, perfect circumstances,  less stress etc will perhaps never come . So let’s enjoy life as a gift of God.

Found in the crowd

The crowd finds itself 

When lots of people 

Are lost in the hustle bustle 

Or smudged by common color

Of emotion or purpose 

Someone always follows the other

Till the crowd gains a momentum

The hissing serpent expands 

Stretches towards  a destination 

And the summation of many mes

Those who are lost in the throng 

For when it is everyone 

It actually implies no one in particular 

The easiest place to hide 

Is the limelight of a crowd 

Out in the open 

With thumping chests 

Weilding candles 

Cracking the masks 

For there is an open garb 

That covers the lost ones 

Who are found in a crowd. 

2101

20.08 hrs

Delhi

10.10.23

The midnight sun

 

 

A scoop of vanilla thaws slowly

Atop the brim of frothy coffee

Sitting beside a glass window

I sip life relishing drop by drop

As the throngs rush on the road

Like a buck on a survival leap

The predator is after his life

Rush he must with all his might

The spur digs deep enough to wound

But wounds do not matter

A little flesh and some drops given

A small bait to save the larger beast

Saddled with fear and tugged by ambition

The buck gallops over the unsurmountable

For they say there is only one life

Sadly the claws continue to gnaw

The whip lashes with every stretch

Faster and faster towards the crossing line

That recedes like an unfinished horizon

The filtered taste of overboiled water

What clogs the strainer with flavor

Remains brushed aside for flow

While the prey must keep afloat

With his ever thudding gallop

For a fall is fatal and die we must not

Only in a quest to live uninterrupted

One signal to another

Collecting trophies ,deserting life

Chased by self inflicted peril

Perspiration of the eyes

And tears of the body

Shredded to tiny bits

The blaze till almost dawn

Life of  the midnight sun

Neither  inn nor way

Molten over the dark night

Like the vanilla scoop

Over the tar of frothy coffee

Across a transparent window

From where one can view life.

 

Delhi

2100

22.39 hrs

5.10.23

The canvas filled by empty palette

 

 

The  boats swirl in breeze

I made these from my canvas

For the brush was dipped

In a palette long back

Now the stroke turns empty

Every drag of brush on canvas

Shows nothing to the onlooker

While my heart pours his hues

On a fading canvas

Much like the twilight

That turns sight into grey and black

The shades are present but transformed

So is an art the moulding of reality .

I wait for the sun in night

Folly awaits his reflection

While wisdom deters the wait

On a moonless night

And waits long enough

To reap the sparkle of dawn

When the grey is filled with shade

The boats return to the painting

The canvas is adorned with tinge

Of a blushing palette.

 

Delhi

23.12 hrs

2099

2.10.23

 

The buried soul

 

A little deeper into graveyard

For my spirit was always alive

Deep where you stood and stopped

I buried my soul and moved on

As if what is left above is alive

The life is a seedless sprout

A shadow stuffed inside an I

When I search for you

I search for myself

And a glance at myself

I can find you ..

Still standing where we departed

Despite not being there

 

2098

2.10.23

Delhi

16.34 hrs